The fog is lifting...

I woke up this morning with my head not lodged fully up my butt. It's been 12 days since Sarah and Tess were born, and I can finally talk to the doctors and register their words. Not only do I register - I make many observations on my own and ask intelligent questions that are helping me understand her care. Finally...

Tessa has a staph infection. This is certainly responsible for some of her fluid retention and oozing skin, but may just as likely be responsible for her inability to maintain consistent blood pressure. If this is the case, combined with the new information from this morning's echo cardiogram confirming that she does NOT have a PDA, then it is entirely possible that her b.p. could greatly improve as her infection clears up.

That said, her infection is serious and she is not handling the stress well. The doctors and nurses now constantly refer to Tessa as a "very sick little girl." I hesitate to touch her anymore and often just watch her for hours because she is so very fragile at this point - more so than when she was born or even a week ago. But I am hopeful that the antibiotics will clear up her infection and that miraculous healing will turn her around soon. In fact, I am going to talk to the doctor this afternoon about whether or not my touch would be a help or hindrance at this time. Many days, the nurses feel she is agitated, although they NEVER discourage me from entering the incubator (with my arm) if I want to.

My infection of the incision (cellulitis) is clearing up beautifully. My white blood count is nearly back to perfect, as of last night's blood work. I ran into the doc who rode with me here on the jet from Marquette in the hallway today - he happens to be the head of Maternal Fetal Medicine here (I feel so special that he would come to assess me himself - they really are great here.) He felt that if my flesh looks healthy, that they could re-close the incision! You have no idea how happy that makes me - the most huge pain in my butt is "the changing of the dressing" twice daily. It runs my life right now. Yesterday I didn't even get to go to the NICU because the dressing literally consumed my entire day. Long story...

Here's to burning off the fog, one day at a time...